She will never know!

Before I type this properly, I would like to point out that this is in no way based on something I have done.

In the woods,
Rain and mud,
Time to wash,
Remove the crud,
Bike in the shower,
She will never know!
Water falls now,
Glistens like snow,
Mud and oil,
Sweat and blood,
From the days toil,
The singing fails,
She is home early!
Hide behind the rails!
Too late,
Your tracks spotted,
You silly man,
Mud and oil dotted,
Across the rug,
Hide the bike!
Not there you mug!
The door burst,
She stands with fury,
Time for the worst....


Its not based on anything that anyone I know has done either....